Unclean! Unclean!

One of the more annoying things about being trapped in the Spiritual Rights Foundation headquarters was the ever-present film of dirt, grease and other filth on the surfaces.  You just could not escape it.  The windows had a smoky haze on them - you wouldn't know it because the draperies were always drawn and the extraordinarily paranoid heavy black shades were almost always drawn over the windows making it impossible to see in or out.

The bathrooms were always bordering on barely-sufficient and gas station shit house.  I recall the smells of the  "downstairs" toilet and the smells of the main floor toilet were something between last week's forgotten leftovers and something the cat left on the porch.  Not quite enough to make your stomach lurch but just enough to make you pause before you entered.

The basement, where the "food" was kept was pretty much a disaster area.  The floor, always sticky with stuff you wouldn't want to think about.  The sparse furniture was generally filthy, the small sofa not only threadbare with sagging cushions, but a cloud of dust arose whenever someone sat on it.

Rodent traps and cockroach traps were laid everywhere.  In the main area, they were carefully (or not so carefully) kicked under cloth-covered tables so the public wouldn't see them.  In the basement, they were laid out for all to see.  No one considered that cleaning the premises and filling up the holes the vermin crawled through would have been a lot more effective.

Oddly, the spa was generally kept fairly pristine.  Well, no so odd as Bill Duby used it regularly and if he found someone's pubic hair floating in it, he'd throw one of his famous tantrums and use his psychic abilities to identify the owner of the hair so that he or she may be forced to suck the offensive materials up in their mouth.  The sauna was kept fairly clean as well.  It was required that towels be used to cover the surfaces and the heat kept on for a few minutes to dry and sanitize the sauna.

After Bill's death, those facilities were somewhat less well-kept.  I recall seeing a dark ring around the spa, when I never saw one before.  Leaves and dirt found their way into the sauna.  The fish pond and fountain were nearly overtaken by algae and whatever other green gunk wanted to grow there.  The backyard, once the pride of the cult, began to take on a more shabby appearance with the sauna looking drab and faded, the spa cracked and leaking.

The cult is holding one of their spa and therapy weekends this month.  I would imagine the faithful few got a hard-sell to attend at gunpoint, as usual.  I think that is what would be needed  if the "therapy" equipment is in as bad a shape as it was when I last saw them.

The kitchen was always covered in a thin film of grease that smelled, well, a lot like kitchen grease.  The dust that constantly floated in the air stuck to this film regularly.  I recall one time when one of the ministers climbed up a ladder to clean off the kitchen ceiling fan (so who in the hell puts a ceiling fan in the goddamn kitchen - the grease just gets blown all around the room!).  As he cleaned, his wad of paper towels scraped off thick, gummy layers of grease-soaked dust.  The women in the area cleared out.  Maybe not so much from the disgusting nature of his work but maybe because they considered those who clean to be themselves unclean.

And that comes to the real topic of this post:  our own social leprosy.

How often has the leaders of the Spiritual Rights Foundation made every attempt possible to separate us from the evil and corrupting influence of society so we may adopt their own evil and corrupt influence?

Have we all been instilled with fear so we may reject the societal norms that would allow us to conduct a normal life?

Have we all been indoctrinated with suspicion of those who "can't have it" or those who are less enlightened than ourselves?

What has that done to us, and our own sense of identity with our daily society?

To the world, the members of a cult are truly unclean.  Unclean in the manner of shunning society and rejecting the norms and values that form the fabric of our human relationships.  Unclean in the sense that our own unclean thoughts and  beliefs made us not only think and act as the hapless misguided followers of a mad man and his corrupt women we began to appear the part.

After surrendering to the evil clutches of the Spiritual Rights Foundation, those who knew my past persona noticed a change.  They could not put their finger on it, but a change there was and it was somewhat unusual and suspect.

Those who facilitated the change in my persona and spirit celebrated that change as it furthered the leader's iron grip of the cult by consuming yet another hapless victim.

Never before were we so willing an eager to empty our wallets, bank accounts and sell assets for the favor of three greedy and evil charlatans.  Never before would we blindly follow an admitted mad man and street hustler.  We could not imagine entrusting our children to a child molester and wife abuser.

But we did it.

And the price we paid was our exclusion from society.

We have been forced to cover our faces to our upper lip, to chant Unclean! Unclean! in the presence of the public.  We have been marginalized as those on the fringes of society.

But not any more.

Our travails have defined our new sense of character.  Those of us who can stand tall and proudly say we have confronted evil and survived are now thriving in ways the cult had never imagined.  Those of you who read this blog, those of you who share this dark experience are stronger because of it.

This blog is less about me and more about you.  Your strength and your determination to right the wrongs and stand up for yourself where you could not before.

This is for those who seek the solace of knowing the SRF experience is a bad dream that ended upon your awakening and the comfort from knowing that only true evil will prey on the good and pure.

And those good and pure are people just like you.

Your strength is your salvation.  You do not need to stand on a soapbox and run on at the mouth as I do.  In fact, unless you really like to hear people shouting "shut the fuck up, you half-wit cultie!" you may want to be the strong, silent type.

But it is your inner strength that drew you away from the bowels of evil.  And that strength is leading you to the life you were truly born to live.