Thursday, December 6, 2012

The Academy for Psychic Studies - Too Old to Fight, Too Beat to Care

Team Celine Rules, fucker!


If you peruse the web site of the "Academy for Psychic Studies" (AKA, "The Spiritual Rights Foundation" or "the slaughterhouse") you will see after many years or absence, the countenances of the remaining staph members of the cult.

If you also recall the condition of those faces back in the day, you'll notice quite a difference in their appearance not really accounted for by the passage of time.

It's the eyes.

Take a look at them.  While the cult has prevented me from adding a link to their website, you can find them via Google if you click on this link here:

Search for Academy for Psychic Studies on Google
note that this link does not go to the Academy for Psychic Studies Website but only conducts a Google search you fucking SRF troll!



If you recall the bright eyes and eager bodies ready and wiling to spread the good word, you'll notice the difference in appearance in all the remaining few.

Sure, Angela Silva appears fresh-faced.  So would you after tens of thousands of dollars of cosmetic surgery, Botox and chemical peels.  The airbrush tool in Photoshop helps as well.

Robin Dumolin presents a fresh appearance as if she just returned from the spa.  Come to think of it, I guess she had - as she does every Tuesday afternoon.

However, look at the rest of them in the eyes: tired, worn or worse - absolutely fucking crazy.

At least on of them is photographed in profile as his full countenance would reveal the dark circles and bags under his eyes.  You'd also see how he's one burger away from a triple bypass (if he lives that long) and a bag of fries from a stroke.  Another has the scrunched face of someone trying way too hard to look like he's having a good time or maybe he just knows Robin will approach from behind wearing her strap-on man-toy after the photo shoot.

The nutty ones are evident as are the ones who are just way too tired and broken to do anything but what they are told.

Now is that the fault of the remaining staff members?

Well, consider the contrast between the appearance of the Witches of Ellsworth Street the elderly few who are bearing the burden.

I mean, if you had slaves to keep you shaded and fanned, a man-servant to tend to your every need while the only damn thing you have to do is complain about their failure to serve and the world's conspiracy to prevent you from receiving your evil birthright, you wouldn't look so bad even without Botox.

However from the other side, your story might be a little different.

Since we have all been there at some point, I guess we would all have to look at the pictures of the remainder of the Academy for Psychic Studies staph and breathe a sigh of relief. 

We might have been them.

  

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

The Academy for Psychic Studies - Too Bored for the Board



During my imprisonment at the Academy for Psychic Studies (or at the least, indentured servitude) Angela Silva proudly announced that the California Board of Registered Nursing approved her very own ISHI Hypnosis as a Continuing Education Provider (CEP) for California's Registered Nurses.

As RN's have to update their skills regularly (for damn good reason) Angela thought such recognition would have nurses clamoring to take the ISHI Hypnosis training sessions and would be willing to pay through the nose for the privilege.

As usual, Angela fell flat on her botox-ed face.

The certificate pronouncing ISHI Hypnosis an approved CEP was framed and proudly displayed on the wall of the infamous "Center Room" of Academy for Psychic Studies HQ so we could all gaze upon it in wonder and amazement.

Personally, I wondered what kind of skulduggery, slight of hand and pure bullshit was offered to the licensing board and was amazed a two-bit, sleazy and otherwise un-American outfit could have obtained an official certification to teach hypnosis to the people whose hands our lives would be placed.

Apparently, Robin Dumolin saw a guest on Oprah pronounce hypnosis had helped her control chronic pain.  So with that unimpeachable reference and Robin's unparalleled skills as an administrator and academic, it was determined that nurses would be perfect to distribute the Academy for Psychic Studies' toxic drug of choice - hypnosis.

As nurses work with the patients who are in the most part cooperative (and if you had the HOT nurses I've had, you'd be cooperative indeed) pleasant and soothing hypnosis would be a perfect cure for all the diseases they might have sought medical treatment to address or at the least, enhanced medical treatment with a psychic and spiritual hypnotic remedy.  

Actually, that was probably the last thing on their minds - after drooling and rubbing their hands together with the thought of the money they could make.

What was never approached, asked about or even considered is how in the fuck would the Academy for Psychic Studies would convince healthcare professionals to give up their real CEP at places like, you know, universities for the mumbo-jumbo and complete crap served up at a ramshackle house in Berkeley's fraternity block where you were likely to have to dodge a vomiting Delta Phi.

No one even thought about how to communicate with the nurses.  No marketing effort was made and no one ever saw a nurse arrive for an ISHI Hypnosis class.

That, for me at least, seemed to be not the real point.  The certificate from the state licensing board was proudly displayed in the center room where inmates were indoctrinated and could have just as easily been located in a more discreet place while still fulfilling legal requirements.

Certainly, if the purpose of the CEP certificate was indeed to show the validity of the ISHI Hypnosis way to professional nurses and give them all the reason they need to throw down two large for worthless information, it didn't work.

On the other hand, you might say the purpose of the CEP certificate was to instill in the remaining few that even the State of California held ISHI Hypnosis in esteem and entrusted in ISHI Hypnosis the high responsibility of educating healthcare professionals and if you have a singe grain of doubt about that, Angela Silva will refresh your loyalty and devotion by cramming your face firmly against said certificate until snot runs from your nose.

Oh, so that's why they got it.


As with so many things in this nutty and fascist organization, the effort to renew the CEP certificate was just too much.  It expired in 2008.

Odd timing.  That's about the time this blog appeared on the scene and the lone ISHI Hypnosis hypnotist and instructor was crying about potential victims discovering from the interweb that ISHI Hypnosis was not only a facade for a horrifyingly evil and deceptive church, the reputation of the ISHI School of Hypnosis was in the toilet (although the instructor was still well regarded).

So maybe Angela sniffed the air with her now Michael Jackson'ed nose and realized if no consumers were taking the ISHI Hypnosis bait, neither would the professionals?

Fourth-grade educated Angela Silva having a moment of revelation?  Are you kidding?

So perhaps Robin Dumolin used the academic prowess acquired from the weaving and crayon art classes at the "special needs" section of the local community center to deduce renewal of the certificate was futile?

Seriously?

I think it's like this: in 2008, not only did the Academy for Psychic Studies begin a calamitous exit of formerly faithful ministers, interest in the place collapsed and the truth about what happens there emerged. That perfect storm put the Witches of Ellsworth Street into a perfect funk.  Their losing lawsuit was the icing on the cake.

That was the time the Witches of Ellsworth were so consumed in laying blame for their travails and taking all the revenge on anyone they could find, they literally had no time to think about proper administration of their operations nor could they find the inspiration to propel their evil agenda to the next level.

So maybe the Witches of Ellsworth Street did indeed have a moment of revelation - it was the moment they realized the ship was sinking.  In their despair, the only thing they had left to do was to re-arrange the deck chairs and have the band play on.

More likely, by 2008 the Witches were so bored and unmotivated to direct their energies into productive pursuits, they could not find the inspiration to turn away from QVC and Oprah to actually, you know, LEAD their nefarious enterprise

The psychotic founder, "Reverend" William Duby, led his naive flock from pasture to pasture, promising greater riches and fulfillment at the next pasture while he derided the current one - even though he never really used its full potential.

Why else did Freedom Estates, Liberty Construction, The Blue Sky Ranch and Sterling Rose Press fail to reach their potential?  What of all the failed businesses and ventures?  How successful was the William Duby business consulting company before it was dropped?  Did Duby sell even one goddamn car from his vehicle brokerage business?  Did he make one fucking penny from his real estate investment business?  Did the bookstore Duby purchased with his follower's money do any more than provide masturbation material for the homeless?

Of course not.  Those business require real business sense and steady management - two items sorely lacking from Bill Duby's skill set and totally unheard of in the Witches'.

Only the business that utilized the skills of a con man were successful. No wonder the Academy for Psychic Studies, ISHI Hypnosis and the Blue Sky Ranch became lumbering and unwieldy beasts when he thankfully dropped dead.